Love is elusive: I know my single ass can’t find it! That’s why I, along with everyone else on this wretched Earth, love stories about gay animals falling in love. It helps me feel like at least somewhere, somebody’s doing something right.
On last night’s episode of BBC Earth’s “Frozen Planet II”, Sir David Attenborough introduced the world to two Antipodean wandering albatrosses. But these weren’t just any Antipodean wandering albatrosses, oh no. These were two young males who found love in a hopeless, subarctic place.
In general, watching birds fight over a mate is hilarious because it reminds us what courtship really is when you strip everything away: just one extraordinarily embarrassing song and dance that essentially adds up to “wanna f*ck?” But when birds do it, it’s, you know, poetry. Especially when gay birds do it.
After trying and failing to woo a woman, one of the young male albatrosses meets his match in another young man. The two vogue at each other until a queer soul connection is made manifest. They even start nesting together and share a few beak kisses. Apparently, hot gay sex is becoming common on Antipodes Island, which may soon be renamed “F Bird Island,” if the Gods are at all just.
Basically, these two dudes found each other and we love it for them. May their nesting days be forever happy and blessed.